Recently I have been given a chance to learn a valuable life lesson. I have had to "give it up to God" and trust someone to change.
Change the things about themselves that they dislike, that hurt people I love, that hurt me. I have to allow this person the room they need to figure out the hurt within themselves all the while protecting the people I hold most dear.
Don't get me wrong, I love this person and I hope they can find the strength within them to be what they want to be, what their children need.
It's hard! I am such a control freak, and I haven't handled the situation in the way I should have. I was scared and frozen, not being true to me or the Punkies.
So now I'm in a place of forgiveness. Forgiveness of myself for not being the best me that I could be and forgiveness of someone who is a huge part of my life. That I hope can continue to be part of me. Help raise these 4 amazing beings that I lovingly call the Punkies. It's scary and it's work everyday. But right now we're both in it fully. I am so grateful to her for doing the work. For showing me that she cares enough to do the really hard stuff.
So for all of you out there that have been needing to forgive someone I say Just Do It! Jump with both feet! And if it's forgiving yourself for something, be gentle with yourself. We all mess up, and we are usually so forgiving with the people around us, you have to give yourself a break once in awhile.......
At the end of the day this is what I live for.................
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